Dealing With Self Doubts
Why do we have self doubts? Why do we question our ability to deliver, what do we do when self doubts rear it's ugly head telling us we are not capable. This is one of the main reasons why we stop short of living exemplary lives.
When God said go and multiply in the book of Genesis, He meant it! We are multi skilled, multi talented, we are able to solve problems to make people's life more comfortable, we are able to earn and enjoy wealth with our various abilities and skills. We are able to flourish in our space. So why do we we stall?
How do we get entangled in the web of self doubt? I have learnt that this is usually from our childhood, it is sometimes a result of how we were raised, also this comes as a result of issues of life and crisis we have had to deal with.
Self doubt usually comes from the fear of uncertainty, fear and worry, or a fear that we won't measure up to others. Other times we have the impostor syndrome, doubting our self and our abilities. Self doubt tells us that we are not good enough or tells us that we don't deserve a certain level of success. There is also Self sabotage, this is usually when we are on track to delivering success in something and we find our selves doing things that destroy all the hard-work. Self doubt can also come in the form of being indecisive and just finding it hard to make firm choices, even down to the smallest choice.
Things we usually do when we are caught in that web of self doubt
- Always seeking re-assurance
- Not able to take compliments easily, and diverting praise
- Low self esteem
- Difficulty in giving yourself credit for work done, allowing others to take the credit
- Feeling you are never good enough
If we break down the roots of our fear and doubt, we will find that it's easy to fight the feeling of fear, sometimes all it takes it just the first step. We should practice having a vision board, we can break our vision down into a plan and our plan into goals, it becomes easier to digest and easier to work on. Then we just have to take the first step and carry out the first set of goals in bite sizes.
Practice Affirmation! Tell your self you are not lacking, you are enough, you are deserving of success, embrace yourself and all your weaknesses. You are the way you for a purpose.That weakness when worked on can become a story of strength for someone else.
Question your own thoughts, remember that our thoughts are the driving force of our lives, so actively question your thoughts, do they line up with success factors? Remember you are in control of your life, you can actively change your thoughts. You are not your thoughts, you can change your thought process and change your life.
Hang out with people who believe in you and bring out the best in you, those who love and support your dreams and aspirations, not people who act like they do, but people who really do, consciously spend more time with them.
Try Therapy, counselling or get a coach, these are people who are well trained and who are able to help you peel off the layers in those area that you struggle with most.
Stop comparing your self with others, it's okay to look back to who you were, as a measure of your own growth, but don't compare yourself with other people, the grass is never green on the other side and everyone's journey is different.
Be grateful and thankful for every growth and every success you achieve, celebrate your self, you are deserving and you are worth it!
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